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name: Alicia
age: 24
screenname: cryztalina, since 8th grade and going strong
email: randomlifeinprogress@hotmail.com
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Monday, October 20, 2003

I hate it when I finish a book that I am devouring. When it's done I only want to read it again, but I can't because it just doesn't feel the same way. It's heartbreaking. So I am a little out of control. Here are the books I am obsessed with recently and a brief description of why.

The Importance of Being Earnest - Oscar Wilde
I have found some pure GD genius in these pages:

Jack. I am sick to death of cleverness. Everybody is clever nowadays. You can’t go anywhere without meeting clever people. The thing has become an absolute public nuisance. I wish to goodness we had a few fools left.

Jack: For heaven’s sake, don’t try to be cynical. It’s perfectly easy to be cynical.

Algernon. I really don’t see anything romantic in proposing. It is very romantic to be in love. But there is nothing romantic about a definite proposal. Why, one may be accepted. One usually is, I believe. Then the excitement is all over. The very essence of romance is uncertainty. If ever I get married, I’ll certainly try to forget the fact.

Don Juan - Moliere
Ok, I'll admit it - I'm in love with Don Juan. It's such trouble, but I am so easily charmed. I was in the library and someone was in the same book row as me and for some reason I felt as if I couldn't just browse, I had to have a book in hand and so I randomly picked Don Juan off the shelf. What a great accident.

Candide - Voltaire
A little hard to begin with because my imagination holds on to imagery of rape and slit stomachs (there it is again) and I feel so bad for him. But that is something in itself - if I feel bad for Candide, doesn't that make me just like him?

Soundtrack to my life:
Dr. Dre - 2001
Amelie - Yann Tiersen
The Big Wheels - Amalgram
Less than Jake - Anthem
Dave Strackany - er, I don't really know. We'll go with untitled


I'm in a brand new place right now in my life, and of course I want to talk about it. I had to pre-empt it with bread and circuses, but now it comes to a head. So here is mine.

I am finally letting go of the childish notion that I can predict or decipher the thoughts of someone I'm interested in. It's put me in a bit of a bind, because now I'm in completely new territory. I have absolutely no idea how 1one1 might feel about me. Think about me. I like to think that I've grown up, but something tells me its even more than that. Being untrusting is so boring. I do let good things in, I'm not a tired cold fish, but I notice myself chafing under this nonchalance. "Oh, it doesn't matter." And I'm right it doesn't. But on a bigger scale it does. I can't tell what is more childish - obsessing or complete apathy. They both are very selfish, it would seem. I guess maybe I'm somewhere in the middle right now, and that's why I'm in new territory. A happy medium. Buddha.

And speaking of Buddha, when I moved my collection from the living room for the party I decided that rather than taking the figures off of their shelf, I'd just take the shelf. I'd just like to go back in time and remind myself that there is no back to the shelf, and it is about 2 inches wide. And I'd like to remind myself to finish my homework for Monday morning, but that's beside the point.

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